family

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Belief, revisited


I pray because I believe in prayer.  But, last night I wondered.  What kind of prayers do I believe in?  I certainly don’t believe that God spares certain people because one has a better prayer chain then the other.  After all, life is not the ultimate American Idol.  Everyday I am surrounded by sad events changing people’s lives.  I know that even those who die had some one praying for them to live.  But, people die anyway.  Why?  Of course I don’t know the answer, nor, I think does anyone.

So last night I decided my prayers need to focus more for help or guidance.  When my mother was ill, just before she died.  I asked God and my angels to guide me through this end of her life. Because I knew it was time for her to go.   I asked them to help me understand what decisions I should make and to let me know what I could and could not control.  Trust me, letting myself realize I’m not always in control, that is big.  It worked for me to let myself be guided.  It wasn’t “just throw up my arms and let things happen”, it was a feeling of peace, knowing that any decision I did have to make I would find help making it.

As I approach new conflicts and decisions in my life I intend to ask for guidance.  Then, take a deep breath and wait for help in getting through this rough patch in my life.

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Really?


Since my mother passed away I have been doing well. I miss her, but I have missed her for years. She hasn’t truly been my mother since her dementia. Consequently, I have been working on getting my life in order and doing many of the things that should have been accomplished over the past several years.
Yet, I still get thrown a curve ball once in a while. I have lawyers working on dissolving my guardianship of Mom. This must be done in order to probate her Will. I have other lawyers working on the Will. Letters were sent out to all of my siblings and by signing and returning the papers, they agree to have my brother and oldest sister and I as the executors of Mom’s Will. Yet, it seems one of my sisters has a problem with signing. Really? What is the point? I know as far as I am concerned, I am ready to be done with all aspects of bills, taxes, and legal papers. By not signing, I wonder, what does she think she will gain? Certainly her lack of signature stalls the whole probate business. Of course any time the lawyers are involved that just spends more money. I personally, want to probate the Will. Then get on with the business of remembering my Mom before dementia.

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Blogging, twitter, FB


Over the past week I have been working, along with help from my niece, on getting myself out there. So here I am blogging on my own website. I find it all very exciting and cool, if I may say that.
Twitter is an amazing place. I’m amazed at how much others put out there for strangers to read. But, I have to say I could easily spend hours reading other peoples twitters.
All that aside, my plan for this site it to hopefully draw more people into the reality of my writing. On this page I intend to put more info and some of my essays. I am trying to get my voice out to the world with the technology.
Bear with me, I am new to this, but the learning is an adventure.

Rosemary