The other day it occurred to me, my life had come full circle.
Recently, my husband and I traveled south to visit my sister and her husband at their lake house in North Carolina. Our first day the guys played golf and my sister and I caught up while enjoying the amazing view of mountains and lake. At sunset, we all climbed into their boat and drove to the middle of the lake to admire the beautiful sight. As we all sat their chatting, having a cocktail, relishing our friendship it dawned on me, this was the first time the four of us had been alone together in over twenty-five years. This very event was what we had dreamt about as young twenty something’s with small children. All those years ago we said to ourselves, someday when we are older we will have time to focus on our relationship again. Someday we will take vacations together. Maybe we will even buy houses beside each other and retire. The guys can play golf and the girls can talk without interruption.
How very surreal to be living your dream, to have it come true. To know we had made it through some difficult times, yet, here we were, just as close, still having as much fun as we did when we were all at Purdue University together.
It is a wonderful accomplishment to have shared a lifetime of experiences with my sister and her husband. I know for a fact that not all siblings remain close and that is why I especially treasure the relationship I share with my sister Roxann. We are sisters and more importantly, friends. I know I count her husband as a friend also. My god! I remember helping him decipher his freshman Purdue schedule by writing it out on a paper plate, apparently the only writing surface we could find. How fortunate we are to have each other, to be able to laugh at past silly memories, to understand why certain incidents cause our eyes to go misty. Friendships that stand the wear and tear of so many years go deep into your very soul.
As I sat in that boat enjoying the view of the sunset and my friends, I understood I could not take this moment or the next few days we had for granted. Who knows how many more times we will have the opportunity to share that dream we all had so many years ago. Life can change in an instant; I think most of us, at least those of us in our fifties, understand this. A moment watching the sunset with the couple I have known the longest in my life was rare indeed. 
North Carolina
Moms Gone Wild
Recently, I went on a road trip with two lady friends. A long weekend spent being a groupie for the band, Trial By Fire. My friend’s son, and a young man I have known since he was a baby, is a member. We had a great time, but quickly realized staying up until the early hours of the morningwas tough work. We were no longer the college students partying away our stress over upcoming finals. Instead, we were three older woman escaping the confines of our daily lives. Our getaway was a needed escape from being the caregiver for a very ill spouse and the sudden, unexpected, responsibility of a mother and nephew. I was the one that had no true commitments. In February I had passed the one year anniversary of my dementia bound mother’s death, and with that, a release to determine what I want to do with the rest of my life.
We three adventurers set out on a journey deemed, Moms Gone Wild. But, how wild can you get in a mini-van? The first night earplugs were distributed so that we could all attempt a good night’s sleep. On Friday we awoke and piled back into our vehicle for a six hour drive. We arrived in Greensboro, North Carolina in time to have a beer while the band set up and did a sound check. I got a thrill of boastful pride when we told the bartender we were related to one of the musicians. That night at the show, with the music thrumming in our chests and the crowd clapping and screaming encouragement to the rock group, we decided to celebrate with a jello-shot. We couldn’t resist as the somewhat solidified alcohol came in a huge syringe. I’ve been in bars before where a band was playing. But, this was different. I delighted in watching the crowd watch our favorite band member. I pondered on how it must feel to be on stage and realize I was bringing such fun to the crowd. What a rush it must be. The night finally ended, for us at least, as we made our way to our beds around 2 a.m. On Saturday afternoon, after two more hours of driving we landed in Charlotte, North Carolina and began the whole process again.
Along the journey, of our weekend away, the three of us shared many thoughts. We reflected on the circumstances of our lives. It never occurred to any of us to complain about what life had thrown our way. Instead, we accepted the obligations and knew we would not do anything differently. Still, that does not mean we did not question what the future would hold and how that now would be so different from what we had envisioned. Yet, we understood we are not unlike so many of our generation, taking on the care of aging parents just when we were ready to enjoy empty nest adventures with our spouse. Or perhaps, as my one friend, realizing those golden years will never come for her and her husband.
That is why this weekend away was just what the doctor would have ordered if prescriptions can be written for such an excursion. A few days in which we came close to reliving our youth; the one that seemed so burdened at the time and, as we have come to understand, no where near that complicated. During the weekend the three of us spent the days enjoying the warmth of the southern sun and hanging in bars with the band at night.
But real life rushed in and on Monday we made the grueling 15 hour endurance test back to our homes. I awoke Tuesday feeling disoriented and exhausted, only to look out the window to an inch of snow on the ground. Welcome back to reality.
Rosemary Christle-Renaud 